Madison VFW 8483

Without a doubt, fish fry’s are a cold weather activity.  They’re usually indoors, use heavy, fried food and the best supper clubs feature wood panels and a fireplace.  With the recent change in weather, my cohort and I got all antsy-in-the-pantsy and went for a brief journey just to the north of Madison to VFW Post 8483.

  

It was the first few gorgeous days after a long winter and obviously, we spent as much time outside as possible and didn’t show up until just before 8 o’clock.  This was not a good idea.  Apparently, they shut down the kitchen at 8pm since it is just a VFW hall and don’t have a full time menu.  I panicked upon hearing this, since I was the only one in my party to arrive.  Compounding my anxiety was the fact YOU HAD TO ORDER AND PAY ONCE YOU WALKED IN THE DOOR. 

Fortunately, I’ve prepared for this situation my entire life.  Hours of shooting baskets, pretending I’m winning the state championship.  

Squatting with small Volkswagons on my back thinking about tackling people at the goal line. 

Ordering countless fish fry’s without even looking at the menu to build my confidence in making “the Perfect Order”.  *quemontage*

Here was my moment.

Cashier: Well we’re about to close, what can I get you?

Me: I have to order now?

Cashier: Yep, and pay too.

Me: uhhhhhhhhh…… I’ll take the fish fry

Cashier: Which one? (there was cod and walleye)

Me: Yes… I mean cod.

Cashier: just the one?

Me: Nope I’ll take *counts on fingers*…Six

Cashier: that’s Fifty-eight dollars

Me: do you take cards?

Cashier: Nope.

Me: Super

It wasn’t what I had envisioned, but I made it through the ordeal and fish was on the way; time to find the bar and a Brandy Old Fashioned-Sweet.

The bar side of the VFW was actually pretty nice looking with plenty of TV’s showing the opening weekend of “The Big Dance” and a good setup with tables you can stand or sit around.  Big enough to fit food or a bunch of empty beer bottles.  Fish Fry aside, this would just be a nice place to post up and watch a few games.  As to the BOFS, I’ve ranted about fancy pants bartenders who think they’re really hot spit…Looking at you Craftsmen Table and Tap…and try to free hand the venerable BOFS only to produce a shitty drink while looking like a douche bag.  Well the VFW’s delightful barmaid started muddling the cherries and I was all, “here we go again”.  I was never so happy to be wrong!!  It was fantastic! Equally balanced sweet with bitters, and medium brandy presence; a gentlemen’s Old Fashioned.  Don’t get me wrong, I went to UW-La Crosse and LOVE a good stiff pint-sized mixer, but to be an accurate reviewer and maintain integrity in the evaluation process, it’s best to stay conscious for as long as possible.  They get 4 Tumblers.

                    

            Despite a limited menu served in a VFW dining hall, there was much class to be appreciated in this joint.  For instance, there was wood paneling everywhere decorated with multiple types of military insignia, pictures of veterans and plaques commemorating feats of yore.  Also, they served the meal in courses. First was the bread bowl, a vanishing luxury, then came the cole slaw.  The slaw was of the cream variety, but was still very light.  Oftentimes, the mayo-base will overcome everything else, but this VFW slaw was, as a fish fry friend and overall health enthusiast put it, “Balanced” (check out herblog).  This was the end of the courses though, the fish came out pretty fast and included baked beans!  I’ve found the bean dish to be an increasingly popular choice, perhaps replacing salad bars due to the filling nature of the legume, but without the cost to the restaurant.  In any case, they had good ones.  The potato choice was different as well with wedges covered in a crispy, tasty batter adding to the usual crinkle fries and baked potato.  The cod was a 6 inch filet, nicely fried, flaky and plenty warm.  A solid entrée to go along with decent, likely store bought tartar sauce.  Three Fish for a solid, but not special, fish fry

 

 Bottom Line: Great Bar scene worth revisiting with solid food but nothing extra special. Big time American points since it’s a VFW.

  

                          THE FUTURE

Loyal Fish Fry Followers,

I know the posts haven't been super topical to the Madison area, but I just moved back and will be hitting up area establishments tonight.

 Do not dispare.

I will lead you all to the holy grounds of goodness and steer you away from fish fry folly.

Sincerely,

The Fiend.

ARDIES/Flipside

            When I started out with this Fish Fry blog, I envisioned a catalog of classic Wisconsin supper clubs, speak-easies, gin joints, and road houses (Swayze).  I never thought my travels would take me into a family restaurant, and yet, my hardy crew and I found our way into Ardies.  A La Crosse fixture right near Menards known to me for an excellent hangover breakfast and AUCE wing nights.  Ardies does have a dark alter-ego called “Flipside” where they dispense their liquor, trivia and Karaoke. 

                                                                    

                                                                    I Love the 'Yoke

         This is where my comrades and I were seated, in the “cool” section, far away from the grandparents and children where our Tinder discussions and hook-up stories couldn’t violate virginal ears. 

            Given the bar was only 15 feet away, we immediately took advantage of our locale and ordered the classic BOFS.  There is only one word to describe the Flipside BOFS: “Terrible”.  It was clearly made from too much syrup out of a Jero bottle, without bitters and only one Maraschino cherry.  The sickingly sweet spirits didn’t just lack taste…it lacked soul. I can’t blame the bartender for his ignorance of the finer points of mixology since 92% of drinks made in La Crosse, WI follow the formula:

RAIL LIQUOR + DIET SODA= DRUNK

Expecting a symphony from someone who plays the recorder is really a failure on my part.  

                                               The BOFS deserves ZERO cocktail glasses

I feel bad for one of my cohort who was at her first Friday Fish and experienced this travesty.  I apologized to her and promised better things to come…which was a terrible idea.  

            As for the food, there was no individual Friday menu or special, just the regular menu, which always included fried fish.  I imagine this is a sound business decision given their proximity to the UW-La Crosse campus and the variety of patrons they have to serve over a week.  However, unlike many places, Flipside added a chicken option to their fish dinners…Friday fowl fry?  It didn’t have the same ring.  I thought it was an excellent idea on paper, but reality proved a bitter chicken to swallow.  The pieces of fish and chicken were both fairly small, which is to be expected from a financial standpoint given the amount of stock the restaurant has to carry.  What I didn’t expect is that they were fried to a crisp with very little meat left on the chicken and the batter was really just mundane.  Not a strong effort on the entrée.

          What Ardies lacked in size of entrée they tried to make up for in tubers, that is, potatoes.  We got a huge portion of crinkle cut fries that were pretty soggy, likely from being left out under the heating lamp too long, or not being fried long enough.

Bottom Line: Maybe they had an off night, but their weren’t many redeeming qualities to the production of food or drink and the underlying quality was poor as well.  I give them ONE Bouy, but only because I’m having a hard time figuring out how to crop out half the bouy so I can give them a HALF Bouy.

THE VIEW BAR AND GRILL

            The bar and grill formerly known as The American Legion had been calling to me to sample their fish for years.  Usually I would drive right by on Highway 16 on my way to work and wonder things like, “Man I want some fish fry” and “work sucks” and “Fish sounds good, but, really, I just don’t want to go to work”.  Finally, one soggy March night, I was going to realize my commuting fantasy.  I always assumed The View stuck to the usual walleye, cod and bluegill stock.  However, as I investigated this place through the interwebs, I found they’re also quite famous for their smelt fry.   Any place ballsy enough to serve smelt, and expect people to willingly eat it AND pay for it, must have intense confidence in their ability to prepare food.

            

Set up on the bluff over looking the marsh, The View didn’t really stay true to it’s name. In the dining room there were no real sweeping views of the marsh, or even windows large enough to see outside.  In fact, it’s a very Spartan set-up in the dining/banquet hall (Which makes sense, being that this is an American Legion).  

                                   "I love fish friiiiiiiiiiiiieeeeessssssssss...and blogs about them"

The entire place is basically painted over cinder blocks reminiscent of my elementary school cafeteria.  There was a separate bar area that looks more pub-like than the bare bones dining area we were seated in but I will leave an investigation of that area for another visit.   The waitress was great, willing to put up with my parties’ opinions about Tinder, craft beer and high school sports while throwing some sass right back at us. 

            

Brandy Old Fashioned Sweet was forgetable.  In fact, so forgettable, I barely remembered I had one.  

One thing I really liked about the food here is that quantity was easily controllable.  The options were two-piece, three-piece, and AUCE. Perfect for all hunger levels.  I went with the three-piece cod.  For the size of the fish, three pieces were plenty to get you full.  There wasn’t a whole lot special about the batter or tartar sauce; average quality really.  Normally I’m an AUCE guy, but this place also had an extensive salad bar. 

There are many ways to measure the value of a salad bar; diversity of toppings, pasta salad variations, variety of leafy greens (spinach vs iceberg),  amount of meat, quality of aforementioned products, etc, etc.  Here at The View, the salad bar can be measured in feet.  The bar itself is probably 10 yards long and provides a quality selection strictly based on the probability of finding something agreeable in such a large space filled with food.  Choice of potato were battered French fries or baked potato. 

            BOTTOM LINE: Nothing special at The View bar, it’s just an average quality fish fry for an affordable price.

Salad bar receives infinite number of cherry tomatoes for it's infinite number of choices and quality

Fish receive 3 fish for affordability and just being generic, but not sucking.

Update: Pub side. Still get salad bar, waitresses still cool.  Fish and potato still, *meh*, but decent.

Red Pines- Brice Praire/Onalaska

Between Lake Onalaska and County Z, off the beaten path in Brice Praire, sits a cozy bar and grill among the red pine trees, named, uh…well…RedPines.  My out of town companions and I put our names in and were given a 20 minute waiting estimate which we spent at the bar watching the Opening Ceremonies of the Sochi Olympics and some weird Russian-themed commercials. 

There was a good mix of folks at Red Pines, families with young kids, extended families with older kids and grandparents, 30-something couples and the ubiquitous Wisconsin bar fly’s easily spotted by their Packer bottle cozies they brought from home.  While not a large establishment, I liked the set-up where my group of 5 could comfortably mingle at the bar without getting in the way of dining patrons.  The homemade cabin décor with large window views of Lake Onalaska and outdoor seating complete with campfire made for an inviting Nort’ Woods atmosphere. Despite it being too dark and cold to really take advantage of those features, you could really feel the rural Wisconsin oozing from the pine-paneled walls.   

At the bar we availed ourselves to the fish-fry staple, Brandy Old Fashioned Sweet.  Their version of the BOFS is quite sweet and strong.  I may have lucked out, though, getting two muddled cherries on the bottom of my glass and one on the toothpick.  Our bartender made sure to really keep the “brandy” in the name, after my first sip made my nostril hair curl a bit.  However it was offset with just enough “sweet” to prevent the booze from overpowering the drink…well done bar-keep, well done.   I give it FOUR nondescript cocktail tumblers.

This Friday Fish special has an extra twist to it since it includes three jumbo shrimp with the two pieces of haddock.  Before the fish came a sweet, tangy “clear” coleslaw with finely cut cabbage, green pepper and carrots.  Call me a purist, but I was raised on the thick, creamy coleslaw that comes with a bite at the end, however, this oil based (versus mayo based) coleslaw was a refreshing variation that would fit in well over summer.  The haddock batter was crisp and the meat flaky and fresh.  Although the fish serving size together was probably the smallest I’ve seen, a thin 5 inches, it was pretty tasty.  The jumbo shrimp were true to name (they were huge) with a nice light breading.  Our choice of potato was either golden, thin, julienned fries or the Red Pines special homemade potato chips.  Both are equally crisp and tasty with a light salting. The chips had enough thickness and crunch to differentiate them from store bought chips and make them a worthy appetizer or side choice.  Topping off the entrée was a crisp-on-the-outside, soft-on-the-inside piece of garlic flavored Texas Toast.  All in all, Red Pines puts on an affordable fish fry with sensible portion sizes with a focus on quality over quantity.  For those looking to leave the typical AUCE fish fry scene, that invariably leaves you too full of fried fish, guilt and shame; venture to the place between the Red Pines.

Overall the food is a FOUR Buoy given its high quality and diverse offering of seafood